Surely by now, you’re wondering where I’ve been. I know you deserve an explanation as to why I’ve been so absent (just think about how those around me feel).

Oh my dear, dear Shower… We’ve enjoyed a long, steamy love affair, have we not? There was a time when I couldn’t go a day without you. Hot is what it was… HOT!

It’s amazing, my husband not only knew about us, but encouraged it. He loved my little rendez-vous with you, Shower. In fact, I even think it made him want me more. So refreshed was I after a romp with you that my husband didn’t mind coming after you. Actually, remember the times when we would ask him to join us? Oh, how we’ve had some wet and steamy times, haven’t we, Shower?

The thing is, I’ve recently had a child, and I just can’t seem to find the time for you anymore. But know this… I am lost without you.

I’m not looking so great since we’ve been apart. Nobody can make me feel like you do. Clean, wholesome. Please don’t think this is a goodbye, but rather a smell-ya-later.

Love always,

Your dirty little secret